2012-01-22 - A Shadow Over Innsmouth, Part I

Innsmouth, home to one of the country's few remaining holiday resorts. The weather is nice no matter the time of year, and it's always perfect for tight-fitting,  revealing swimsuits. But something has been.../wrong/ with the place lately. More than twenty tourists have gone missing from Innsmouth in the last month, and there have  been reports of strange shadows and eerie groans from the sea at night. Deciding to investigate the situation personally, the head of the Hadou Financial Group, Ruri Hadou,  has asked Kurou and a few of his friends to accompany her on the trip.

She brought her finest swimwear, in which she is currently soaking up some rays on the beach. Her maids wait nearby, still dressed in their maid outfits. Winfield, sharply dressed as always, stands right by his lady's side. But as far as she can tell, there's little need for protection here. Such a sunny, peaceful place couldn't /possibly/ contain any hidden evils, right?

"The investigation's going well so far. No sign of the Black Lodge, or Divine Crusaders, or monsters, or anything." Ruri observes, daintily sipping a glass of fine wine.

"That may be so, my lady, but we must remain vigilant nonetheless." Winfield responds, holding the bottle ready to pour Ruri another glass.

"Yes, but some relaxation couldn't hurt, right?" Ruri asks, finishing off the glass.

Winfield carefully refills it, nodding ever so slightly. "I suppose not. But what of Daijuji? Surely his diligence and boundless dedication to his job will leave little time for  relaxing."

Surely.

'Diligence!' 'Boundless dedication!' 'DAIJUJI KUROU!'

All of these three things are /completely and totally true./

For instance, right this minute, Daijuji Kurou is DILIGENTLY covering himself in a layer of sunscreen. His BOUNDLESS DEDICATION sees him organize an impromptu game of beach volleyball with himself and his book on one side, and his TRAILER FRIENDS on  the other! And all this while being DAIJUJI KUROU, ACE DETECTIVE.

I mean, hell, look at it like this. He totally just lobbed that volleyball too high, and went and arced right into a pile of sand being managed by a couple of men in trunks and  /supsicious masks and hats./ Because it seems that, even in sunny Innsmouth, the  Black Lodge's underlings are out and about!

In this case, though, the person in the pile of sand is no mere underling, but a certain SUPER SCIENTIST. Kurou squints at the man on the beach, idly counting down the seconds until he's tackled by a certain android.

Yep. Kurou sure is looking for those missing people right now. Totally.

Staren is kind of _like_ a trailer... at least, among those in Katharon (though as he's officially dead to them his status is kind of in question), he is friendly towards the  trailers unlike parts of Katharon command. Hey, an invitation to go somewhere and do something for fun and socialization with Kazuma and his magician friends is... pretty  nice actually! He'll try not to rant and piss people off this time. Like Kurou, he's putting on sunscreen in preparation for the volleyball game.

Solis Vivent is seated back more or less as far from the surf as he's able. Presently, he's wearing what appears to be a black wet suit, emblazoned with a pair of skull-in-a-gear  style insignia on the chest, and looks very similar to a Bond henchman...sans speargun. He frowns as he watches the ocean, and reviews a small grumbling device, that sounds like an imperial probe droid with strep throat... "...still nothing from Kabayakawa... why did I come here?" He looks back and sees...the ocean staring back at him... He busies himself with his device, apparently conducting the sort of scans that only interest folks like Solis.

"That was out of bounds and you know it, Kurou!" Kazuma mocks good-naturedly, even before he turns to see where the ball landed.

.... yeah, nothing suspicious at all about those guys, the weird-looking masks are probably just to keep their mugs from getting sunburned out here. Same for the hats, direct sunlight for too long is murder on one's hair, why do you think the archetypal  surfer dude is bleached blond?

And if you believe that line of reasoning, Kazuma's got a very nice bridge on Mars that he's looking to sell. Kazuma makes the best of it, though, calling out, "You guys okay over there?" and mentally measuring the distance from himself to his jacket which is fairly neatly folded off to one side of the 'court', gauging how fast he can go for it if push  comes to shove.

Scans that only interest folks like Solis?

"What's that? Are you scanning for something or did someone get you into videogames?" Staren approaches curiously, but does _not_ try to see over Solis's shoulder. That would be rude.

What would an AI android have to do with a beach?

One he was actually paying Crest a visit in Nevada (le gasp), in order to talk to them about a slight deal. Though what that deal may be was hard to say. Next he over-heard some stuff was going down, so here he was. His unit not far from the beach, but hidden away. He himself in an old leather pilot jacket with the Raven symbol on one side and the Operator emblem on the other. A pair of jeans, combat boots, and a white t-shirt. Along with those avaiator glasses of his.

Yep, he was here on a beach... In normal clothing.

Solis Vivent glances over his shoulder at Staren's approach. He peers at him for a moment, "It seems we have a diverse group here today." He looks back to the ocean, "I am scanning for something. I am presently conducting an augur into the air for detection of various potentially dangerous broadbands of the  noosphere, I am also monitoring to see if Miss Kabayakawa has responded to my  hardline diaphram-based vox channel system...but thus far, nothing." He nods, "And yes, I have been conducting other forms of 'video game' recreation. Albeit, I am often told I play the games inappropriately. Why are you here, Staren?"

Solis 'plays the games wrong'? Curious... "Kazuma's magician friend invited him, and he invited me... I... Don't get many opportunities to socialize, you might have  guessed. ...They tend to go badly. So... I guess I need opportunities to work on it?"

Doctor West, the most brilliant mind the entire universe has ever known in its immeasurably long history of geniuses, has come on this day to this beach to build the  greatest sandcastle the world has ever seen and will ever see! Standing a full and majestic two feet high, it has yet to take the shape of a proper castle. But worry not, for it is but a larva in a coccoon, awaiting the moment when it may hatch into the beautiful  butterfly through the power of West's awesomely mighty plastic toy shovel!

And then a volleyball crashes down like a meteor from the heavens, obliterating this beautiful work of architecture in the making like an anthill being flattened by a very  large and very antagonistic rock. Dr. West turns his magnificent head, filled with the grayest of matter, in the direction the ball came from and oh god it's Daijuji.

"YOU!" he shouts, his voice a mix of anger and fear and disbelief that his luck would really be so bad as to meet his fated archnemesis /here/ of all places. His horrifyingly outdated swimwear, with its white and red stripes and the little swimming cap atop his  head to protect his flowing mane of lime green hair, is only outmatched by that of his  henchmen. Blue is mostly harmless to the eye with his swimming trunks, but Yellow's speedo, Red's thong, and Purple's /fundoshi/ might be more than the average human  mind can handle. Doctor West points an accusing finger in Kurou's direction, perhaps about to declare his intent to /fight/ Kurou with /giant robots/.

But then Elsa flies out of nowhere, in a rather tight-fitting two-piece swimsuit, and tackles Kurou to the ground. Her cry is like that of a wild beast that has sighted its prey and sprung for the kill, about to eagerly sink its jaws into the warm, tasty flesh.

"DARLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!"

And thus the overly affectionate nuzzling commences.

Solis Vivent hrms and nods, looking a little stormy... "...yes, failures at socialization can result in...very bad situations..." He looks at the ocean, "Women are strange, strange creatures, Staren." He does glance over at the outburst from West... "Hrm, that man's swim suit resemble's Baron Ashura's..." As the exchange continues, he stands, "...Wiremu, do you have a machine close by?"

R was just staring out at nothing really. Then the screech of a great beastial cry was made by a woman as she tackled her boyfriend of a prey (That is her boyfriend  right)?

He adjusts his shades a tad. "..Well.. this is exciting." He remarks calmly before walks across the beach now with his hands in his pockets. If a fight was going to break out, R could easily get to his machine. Though he machine had on hand was /not/ eco friendly.

Well, it was, so long as he didn't kick on the Primarl Armor.

Staren nods sadly. He has... ruined his fair share of social encounters. Women... he just shrugs. "I doubt I know any more about them than you." He nods slightly, frowning.. Baron Ashura's swimsuit was... not a visual he wished to recall.

Wait, it's that West guy! Staren just... sweatdrops. "Really? This guy again?" He nods to Solis, tapping the side of his own head. "I can call it quickly enough."

"Oh don't give me that," Kurou sighs, rubbing at his temples. "Look, it's not like I planned to see /you/ here, of all places. What are you guys even doing loitering around  in those outfits, anyway? At least get the henchmen to take off their masks and-"

Oh God why'd he have to look that way.

"And get them to put /on/ some pants. Jesus, that's just terrib-" Annnnd there's that sound. That telltale, shrill, fangirlish squeal and that /sudden tackle/ from behind that can only mean his stalker finally found him.

So, that's what this is. It was Elsa all along. Searching for him. Hunting him down. /Conveniently arranging/ for them to be in the same place at the same time.

Well, Al Azif for one isn't going to stand for it! She across the sands, eminating something that /vaguely resembles/ the killer aura of some kind of demon from beyond  the pale of our dimensional walls. "Hey!" She yells, her hands on her hips (which are, in fact, covered by a frilly, vestigal skirt), "Kurou! What's going on over here? Why are you  letting some robotic hussy rub herself all over you, and..." She jabs a finger at the Doctor, "More importantly, what's he doing conscious!?"

We all know what's about to happen. It won't be pretty.

Kazuma cringes at Solis's mention of Baron Ashura's swinsuit. Now THAT was truly a cosmic horror fit to drive onlookers to madness, and the fact that he escaped with his  sanity roughly as intact as it ever is still impresses Kazuma when he thinks back on  that bizarre encounter with the Crusaders while off-duty.

Then, suddenly, an Elsa appears and descends upon Kurou like something slightly less inappropriate than how Kurou already spends all his time with a girl who looks like  she's only in elementary school. Not that a middle-schooler is much better, and that's with some generous rounding (*ahem*). "Need any help there, Kurou?" Kazuma calls out casually. "Or have you and Al got this one handled?"

Solis Vivent glances at Staren and nods, "Good. Stay ready. These situations tend to devolve.." He kneels down, pulling his beach towel aside, where a black box is hidden... He reaches down and carries it over towards the group, "Is there a problem here?"

Staren nods, and heads back to the beach blanket with his stuff, including his pistol. Glancing back at Solis, and wondering what's in that box. Oh right, he can

DETECT MAGIC

Maybe that will give him an idea.

Elsa is designed to detect demonic auras, of this sort and others. It helps in finding missing Necronomicon pages, which haven't actually shown up on screen in a while. But now, it merely alerts her to Al Azif's menacing presence as she stomps angrily over and starts yelling at Kurou. It's always the man's fault, you know.

"What, are you jealous?" Elsa taunts Al, looking perhaps a little smug. "A book like you who looks like she should still be in kindergarten could never get his attention."

But Dr. West, in all his blindingly brilliant glory, strides purposefully toward Kurou and Elsa, reaching down with one perfectly sculpted arm to grab his creation by the arm  and pull her away. And then /run like hell/, because he knows /exactly/ what's coming next, and he /wants no part of it/.

"Red, Blue, Yellow, Purple! Hold him off!" he orders his henchmen as he dashes past them. Immediately, the four of them jump into combat positions, lining up and posing in a manner not at all like a Sentai team. They are the only thing standing between Kurou and the quickly retreating West, and they are /scared out of their wits/.

In fact, they may just break formation and start sprinting after their master if Kurou so much as twitches his finger.

Solis Vivent watches as the inevitable occurs, he opens his case, throwing it aside and revealing the contents... Its a pistol... Solis holds the pistol aloft, as magnetic barriers begin to pulse and operate, giving off a  sharp blue glow that is almost lumiscent... He aims it at the retreating Dr. West, "Halt! Behold the forced fusion effect pistol! It  operates by creating a singularity of burning plasma and..." Solis tosses the weapon aside into the surf, sending up a sudden superheated gout of sea water from the explosion... He looks at it... He then looks at West, "In any case, HALT!"
 * Containment loss. Magnetic bonds failing* "...it also apparently gets hot..."

"HELL NO!" West shouts back, running /even faster/.

It's not Kurou they have to worry about.

"...Jealous?" she growls, her hand twitching at her side. "/Kindergarten?/" You can practically /taste/ the the cataclysm that's about to shatter the peaceful beach  atmosphere.

In fact, Kurou has taken this very moment to leap into the sea and away from the line of fire.

Except 'line of fire' does not apply to 'FIREBALL.'

"I'LL SHOW YOU INADEQUATE, you LIVING SEX DOLL!" Al Azif roars, her hands lifting to the sky. Suddenly, there is a very /large/, very /hot/ ball of fire over head, "Just try to run! I'll burn you /so hard/ your grandchildren'll be missing their eyebrows!" And then, she tosses it.

A half second later, there's an explosion.

Yep, just another day in the life of Daijuji Kurou.

R watches as the chaos breaks out and gives a sigh. "Someone handle the YMCA crew." He says motioning to West's minions. As for himself..

He pockets his shades, those aqua green eyes flash brightly, almost the whole eye glowing that color before he crouches down. Then with a hard kick off of his feet, and sand blasting into the air. The AI android was on a dash run to go chase (catch) up with Mister West.

Huh, apparently the box _isn't_ magic. Wait, fusion effect? And did the... 'robot' just call that girl a book? What? "Ahh my eyes!" Staren raises an arm to protect his eyes as Al goes all magic and starts _did she just throw a fireball_ she must be the little sister of  that magician woman from before or something or... she's a book, whatever that means. And now R is off to catch West and... Staren can't run as fast as an android, especially not in the sand. He'll just... be ready in case West comes back, possibly with a giant robot.

Well, Kurou didn't SAY he needed help ... and Kazuma instinctively hits the deck as Al charges up that fireball and tosses it at her rival, or whatever Elsa is to the  Moenomicon herself. Once the explosion has subsided somewhat he gets back up, darting over to grab his jacket and pull it on, rummaging in the inside pockets for a  couple of things.

When he pulls his hands back into view, he's wearing what look like a copper-studded pair of fingerless leather gloves, apparently with semi-integrated brass knuckles. They do not look like something professionally made, and they sure as heck aren't piloting  gear.

And with his gloves on, Kazuma starts jogging towards West's lackeys, fully alert in case anyone pulls out a gun or something similarly hazardous at a distance.

Dr. West can /feel/ the air becoming a thousand times more threatening, choking him and pressing in like the walls of a deathtrap he might have built once. The concentration of /rage/ in the area has become such that a mysterious and very, very  ominous Latin choir has begun to sing from out of nowhere. He hears his henchmen quickly catching up to him, unencumbered by a very heavy mechanical elf girl, and he  pushes his legs to their utmost limit to try and get away before...

KABOOM.

The explosion propels Dr. West, Elsa, and the henchmen high into the air, sailing off into the distant horizon. It looks like the Black Lodge is blasting off again.

Ruri, meanwhile, is doing her best to ignore all of the chaos going on around her. The explosion from Al's fireball throws up a massive fountain of sand, which conveniently  falls /right toward/ the 'princess', but Winfield has come prepared. With a flick of his wrist, an umbrella shoots out of his sleeve and into his hand, and he unfurls it just in  time to protect Ruri and her wine from a sandy shower. When it's over, he puts it back with another flick of his wrist, and then continues pouring more wine like nothing  happened.

And thats when a metal tip pierces through the top of the sand, spinning around as it clears through the beach and comes to a halt. The drill receeds back into the ground and one dark skinned redhead in apith helmet pokes through the sand and looks up at  the sun. "The hell? It's not supposed to be daylight." She takes a portable electronic device from her belt and pokes at it.

"NORTH AMERICA?!"

"I must have skipped through La Gias some how..."

R slides to a stop as he watches the Fireball sail by and then..

He pulls out his shades, "Looks like you," He then puts on his shades, before turning around. "Just got served."

Then the explosion.

Now R idly makes his way back.

And don't worry people! R is a-ok. He is not have any Dynamic AI loops.. We think.

Al stands imperiously before the carnage unfolding in front of her. Kurou scrambles to his feet (and away from the plasma pistol) to join her, crossing his arms like some  sort of Boss. A few moments pass, before he glances down at his little companion and asks, "You uh. You did try to not hit me with that, right?"

Al looks back over her shoulder, her eyes narrowed suspiciously. "...Maybe."

"...Right," Kurou sighs, "That means yes, then."

LATER THAT NIGHT

Ruri, naturally, rented some rooms in the finest inn in Innsmouth, which includes such luxuries as a steady supply of alcohol and an outdoor mixed-gender bathing area,  perfect for awkward situations and wacky hijinks. For now, at least, she and her servants have assembled in the dining room, where they have arranged a traditional  Japanese drinking party. Sake flows freely from bottles into little bowl-like cups, whoever may be holding them, and a low table with cushions for seats has been  arranged in the center of the room. Ruri and her group, at least, have all dressed themselves in yukatas for the occasion.

The children under Leica's care (because they were there the whole time and were just not mentioned until now) have to make do with juice, but Leica herself has been  steadily downing sake since the whole thing began. Ruri, too, has imbibed an impressive amount, and a little drunken blush reddens her face. Even Winfield is slightly tipsy, but he tries hard not to show it. The maids, on the other hand, have no such restraint, causing all sorts of havoc over in their corner of the room.

BUT WHAT ABOUT EVERYONE ELSE?

Solis Vivent hasn't been drinking, and isn't bathing. He's presently seated on the roof of the establishment, running a whetstone along a broad blade, which he took out of another case... Solis for his own part, is innocently unaware that his position would be ideal for spying on the girls bath...and fortunately for him, none of the staff or patrons have noticed him  yet. "...why does a place named Innsmouth, in America...have Japanese hot springs..."

Juku Reimaru, while wealthy, doesn't say no to free meals, drinks or mixed gender hotsprings. Or even Yukatas.

The redhead takes another big gulp of sake, finishing off her Nth cup for the night and lets out a whoo! as she leans forward over the table, proping herself up with one elbow as the yukata strains like it was a size too small.

"Ish nice of you to throw us all a party, I only jush showed up too!" She lifts herself up and leans forward over the tablet with her hands proping herself up to peer and  squint at Kurou. "I don't recognize you though..." She suddenly HICs! causing her to jump slightly.

Maximium Fanservice.

((Where N is the number of cups of sake it takes to get Juku hilariously drunk.))

"Because some things transcend national boundaries," says a voice behind Solis, "and a good hot bath is one of them." The voice belongs, of all people, to Horis Horyan, who may or may not be up on the roof for less chivalrous reasons than Solis himself. He's brought a bottle of sake with him, and a couple of cups, on the off chance that he  wouldn't be alone.

The rest of the Valstork Family is largely with the party; Mihiro and Kazuma are contentedly nursing cups of juice, and Blessfield is talking over business-related  anecdotes with any members of the Hadou Financial Group who are still of a mind to  discuss anything even remotely related to business; Bless might even have known  Ruri's father and/or grandfather, given how extensively his network of contacts runs, so  the chance to acquaint himself better with the heiress is probably welcome, if not  overdue. Akane and Shihomi are being very moderate in their consumption of alcohol, but both of them look REALLY good in yukata.

"Maybe it's specifically a japanese-style inn? Like a foreign food restaurant, except an inn instead." Staren pauses, and thinks back to his last visit to the Archangel. "I mean, if a Federation-produced battleship can have hot springs, why _not_ an american  inn?"

Kurou /has/ been drinking. It's the SOVEREIGN RIGHT of Demonbane's pilot and/or Ace Detective, Daijuji Kurou. Al is drinking, too, but it's a little difficult to get a magical, humanoid interface for a sentient piece of occult literature intoxicated at all. Instead, she sips at her cup while watching the antics unfold around her with an amused smile  on her face.

She most certainly objected to being offered juice, thank you very much.

Kurou laughs heartily as he tips another dish of sweet, sweet Sake down his throat. "There ain't nothin' better than booze and drinks and food and dining and watchin' with a bunch of pretty ladies after a long day's work. Right? Right?" Kahahahaha!"

Al does not look very amused. Or maybe she does. It's hard to tell.

Solis Vivent blinks and glances behind him...he spots the sake drinker and...Staren and wonders why everyone joined him on the roof... He turns and looks back, "...ah, hello Staren, we got interrupted earlier and..." He looks at the guy with the sake, "You, Sir. What brings both of you up here?" He draws his whetstone along the blade, "...I wish Shiori was here. She enjoys hot springs."

Staren replies, "I'm bad at parties and too young to drink. And um... I wanted to apologize to you for earlier... It wasn't my idea to smuggle mobile suits through the  spaceport... and honestly lately I've begun to feel less sure about some of Katharon's  leadership..."

"Man, it'sh gettin' pretty hot in here..." one of the maids says, loosening her yukata. As if this is the cue for some grand conspiracy amongst them, the rest of the Hadou Financial Group women do the same, and even Leica joins in. With so much bountiful cleavage everywhere, it must surely be paradise for some of the men. And then Ruri sidles drunkenly up to Kurou, leaning on him for support as she stares at his face.

"You have a really pretty face, Kuuurou..." she says dreamily, slurring slightly. A snap of her fingers brings her maids to her side, snapping to attention like a trio of well-trained  soldiers. "Ladiesh...I think it'sh time to give Kurou-chan a makeover."

With a chorus of EEEEEEEEEEE's and a disturbing sparkle in their eyes, the trio of maids somehow grab a full makeup kit and several dresses out of nowhere, and thus begins  the Super Special Makeover Montage.

"The captain seems to have matters well in hand downstairs," Horis says with a casual grin - then pauses, tilting his head a bit as he hears the squeals from downstairs. "Although I think I'm missing some of the best of the entertainment ... anyway, you can call me Horis. I'm the Valstork's helmsman. It's good to make your acquaintances, Solis  Vivent, Staren Wiremu." He pours a cup of sake for himself, raising the cup in a toast before sipping it.

Solis Vivent nods, looking perplexed at the sound, "Uh, hello Horis..." He looks at Staren and nods, "We need to follow our own judgments, Staren, that was what I was trying to beat into your skull that night. I am still a Divine Crusader, but the true kind, not the false kind, not the kind motivated by hatred as I once was. I fight for  mankind, for those who need defending, and I do it my own way." "Katheron, from my experiences. Are petulant, self righteous fools. They are wont to endanger others for their own poorly defined goals. They are children, raging at their  fathers. They are rebels who wish to tear down, but have no idea of what to raise." He does move a tile aside, trying to glance down at the goings on below, "...nothing except for women..."

"W-w-woah, what's this?" Kurou gapes as /women all around/ begin loosening their clothes like this was some kind of contrived H-Game scenario. "D-damn! I didn't expect a show, too!"

Al twitches a bit.

And then Ruri shoves herself /right/ in Kurou's face. Man, what is it with pubescent girls and Daijuji Kurou, anyway? "Uh, y-yeah. I guess I do and--" Kurou's eyes widen as, suddenly, he experiences more terror than he would feel on average hunting down a  run of the mill cosmic horror. "Uh. Uhhh--" He backs away, scooting across the floor, before he runs into the heels of yet another woman, carrying a pure, white dress  ominously overhead. "A-Al! Help!"

Al Azif certainly does not help. She just sits there, grinning like a cat as her master is subjected to the sort of humiliation you hope to forget after a night of drinking.

When all's said and done, Kurou is successfully dolled up in a very fetching white dress- it really does show off his figure rather well- and expertly applied makeup. Why, if people didn't know better, you might think him a rather fetching woman! Except he's certainly not. And he suddenly finds all the good cheer from a moment ago drowned by an inexplicable feeling that he had just been violated in some intrinsic way.

"...My pride," Kurou (doesn't) sniffle, "My poor, violated pride."

Juku looks only slightly annoyed as Kurou is dragged off before her question is answered. Well it wasn't a question, it was a statement, but thats just a detail! Her head swivels to look at Al, a smile spreading across her face.

Juku uses her hands on the table to lift herself up as she walks sideways, moving around the table hand over hand. She reaches Al's position and flops down beside the book-girl. "You're adorable." She says, "Why'dya hang out with the..." she points at Kuou, wrinkling up her nose,

"The cross dresser?"

"Not that theres anything /wrong/ with that. I know this guy in Texas colony that wears a wig and fallcies and everything, but he's the best weapon smith I've ever  known."

"Pleased to meet you." Staren extends a hand to shake Horace's, and winces a bit as Solis explains his view of Katharon. "They mean well, but... Their lack of results since exposing the titans has led me to... begin questioning things. But I don't know who can  do better. Neither the Crusaders nor the Federation have really made much progress  towards a more peaceful world. ...What's all that fuss down there?"

Kazuma sideglances at the maids who are dragging poor Kurou into, well, drag ... and he quietly starts making *ABSOLUTELY SURE* that at least two of his sisters are between him and the maids at all times.

All times. No exceptions. The fact that Shihomi and Akane seem to find the sight of Kurou-in-woman's-clothes absolutely adorable and at least a little amusing doesn't set Kazuma much at ease, but no way is he going to let them do THAT to HIM.

He's got enough bad memories of such things as it is.

Fortunately, Akane is just far enough under the influence to suggest that the maids dress Mihiro up next; Kazuma is ignored.

Solis Vivent looks over at Staren, "Oh. Mostly unclad women are molesting Kurou." He runs the whetstone over the blade, "I admit, after the altercation on the beach, i was expecting something more violent..." He does look back, "And that is the problem, Staren. Do not tear down before you rise up. In any case, you should probably go down and rescue Kurou. The women appear  intoxicated"

Al sips at her sake, looking quite pleased with how Kurou has found himself bound by the laws of karmic justice. Stare at other women, will you? Vengeance, says the universe. VENGEANCE!

Oh, someone's talking to her.

She raises a thin brow at Juku. "Well of course I'm adorable," she says, rather precociously, "But that's not why I'm hanging out with my lecherous, crossdressing  louse of a partner." She smirks, wagging a slender finger, "I could tell you! But that'd be cheating. So I'll just wait until I can show you instead."

A moment passes.

"Also, uh," she coughs, blushing a bit, "So you could say that this guy you know forges weapons like he forges his own gender?"

"Raise what, though?" Staren looks over the edge. "...'Rescue' him from drunken women? I think I might get yelled at for that. Maybe he wants women's attention. Also  what, am I going to be bodily fighting them off or something? They outnumber me!"

Solis Vivent looks down the length of his blade, "Use your reason. I'd do it myself, but I am already in a slightly tenuous situation with my Shiori..."

"...You know, whenever I use my reason people yell at me. But _not_ using it would mean doing something foolish."

"Juku aparently thinks that joke is hilarious because she starts laughing like an idiot. "That's exactly what he would say!" She calms down and leans in to whisper to Al.  "He looks pretty good dressed up too, he does this whole old west cowgirl thing. I've seen a few guys try and flirt with him." she sickers "The looks on their faces when they  found out."

Oh, yes, Kurou looks absolutely /ravishing/ in that dress. Ruri rests her head on the table, a drunken smile on her face as she watches the antics. It's nice to just cut loose every once in a while, and what a way to do it. But wait, it's just not complete yet. There's still something missing...

"Hey, whaddabout that...Staring guy? I bet he'd look /great/ in a dressh!" she calls out to her maids, who all immediately drop what they're doing (which could be dressing up  Mihiro, or possibly pestering Kurou even more) and start scrambling around in search of  the young mad scientist.

For the moment, at least, Kurou is forgotten.

"That's nothing," Al replies, snickering. "Sometimes, I like to hang off Kurou's shoulder like a lusty schoolgirl. It gets eeeeveryone staring at him, and then things get awkward  and we usually have to run before the cops arrest him for seducing a minor." She smirks, "That's always fun."

Kurou is certainly not having fun, and instead appears to have been slumped over for long enough to doze off. Seems like he's had a bit too much alcohol.

Solis Vivent moves the roof slate to the side... Its then he hears the message... He looks at Staren, "Staren. I will always be your friend. So please forgive me for this..." He sheaths the weapon, stands, and promptly takes off in a running jump, landing with a massive sploosh in...

The woman's side of the spring.

Juku guffaws! "Damn! Thats cold!." she grins. "So I guess you're not as young as you look, huh?" Juku tries to move a shoulder of her yukata back into place, but it just slips off again as she leans into Al again.

"So, you and him an item then?"

Al sputters, spraying her sake all across the table in a fine mist of confusion and alcohol. "W-what? Me and him- he and I, a couple!?" Al coughs, half-choking on what sake she did have left in her mouth, "W-what made you think of something so  ridiculous!?"

Juku hahahas! as Al sprays sake, "Well from the sounds ofit your glued to him at the hip." She leans in close to Al "And a few mintues ago, you had that look of jealousy satisfied on your face." Juku grins.

"You... you're my friend? Thanks, Solis, I..." And away Solis goes. "Uh." Well, noone knows he's up here. Maybe he'll be safe! Though he casts a war eye to the roof door...

"Y-you must have been imagining things," Al stammers, looking away. She's gotten a little bit red in the cheeks. "Th-there's nothing between us! Just partners. That's it!"

Horis just continues sipping sake, listening with increasing bemusement to the antics going on below. If he's paying any particular attention to the springs out back, he's not showing it.

As for Kazuma - well, Solis just droped in, and Horis HAS to be around somewhere, but he's not about to give away where he thinks Staren is. If Staren wants to keep looking like a guy, far be it from Kazuma to try and thwart that desire.

Juku oh-hos and smiles slyly. "Is that so?" She leans into Al, giving her no personal space at all, sliding one arm around her back. "So if I were to go up to him like this, that'd be okay?"

Solis Vivent steps up from the spring, wearing his now soaked wet suit. He pauses, as he steps up on the rocks, not aware if he's sharing the pool with anyone else, before he  unzips the wetsuit, revealing an immaculate black suit beneath.

There is indeed someone in the bath that Staren just jumped into, and she is just smashed enough to sneak up behind him and give him a big, wet, naked hug. That someone, incidentally, is Leica.

"Oh, hey there. Getting out already? Come on back in, the water is fine..." she whispers into his ear, her breath smelling quite strongly of alcohol (as if it weren't obvious  enough). /What would Shiori think/?

And Solis' attempt at James Bond style hijinx is foiled immediately by nude soggy hugging... He pauses for a second, allowing his processors to run, developing appropriate  solutions...he begins running projections... Projection #172: Solis: Shiori, I did not intend this. Shiori: You hurt me Solis! *lights subject on fire* Projection #1901. Solis: Shiori, I was hugged by a naked drunk woman. Shiori begins crying. Net determination. No outcome good. Solution?  Solis frowns, "...great..." He then makes what will be known as Mistake No. 2, and /turns around/, "Miss. This is highly inappropriate."

"N-no! Certainly n- I- I mean-" Al stutters, and seems to be trying to shrink into herself like a turtle pushed far outside of its comfort zone. "W-why should I care what woman goes and rubs themselves all over him. I-it's not like I like him, or anything!"

Leica doesn't know what's going through Solis's head, but she knows what's going through hers. Here is another lost little orphan seeking guidance, and she's the one who's going to do the guiding, though the definitions of those words might be a little  muddled at the moment... And then he turns around.

Suddenly, Solis finds himself with a face full of boobs. Large, bouncy, firm yet somehow marshmallowy soft boobs. Well, this is awkward...not that Leica seems to care, in her current state. She just hugs him even tighter, her grip surprisingly strong. Almost...inhumanly strong.

Juku grins like the chesire cat, leaning closer, and clsoer to Al. It's at the point where /soemthing/ looks like it's going to give way and this will turn into something  more then teasing...or at least show some skin.

Until Juku pokes al's cheek with her finger with a goofy grin. "You liiike hiiiim."

"I- I do not!" Al squeaks, steam looking as though it might start rising from her any second now. "W-w-we're just coworkers and good friends is all! R-r-really!"

She's almost positively lying.

For the second time in his life, Solis finds himself in this situation. And per the karma of the world, he's probably the man at the springs who is the least likely to enjoy it... Neverminding that he actually is an orphan, Solis finds himself again with two primary  issues. He is having trouble breathing. This will definately not look good. A tiny little spark of basic man awakens in the back of Solis' mind, reminding him his level of stamina can allow him to go without oxygen for at least several more moments,  but the more honorable and less hormone driven parts of his psyche inform him to  struggle. Cyborg meets cyborg in the challenge of removing his face from a naughty place and Solis thus pulls back. Unfortunately, his action and force is predicated on the assumption that his 'opponent' is still on balance and her eustachian tubes are functioning properly. He didn't account for intoxication.

Juku slides around to look Al directlyin the eyes, only inches away from her face, a red blush across ehr cheeks from hte sake. Her eyes half lided.

"Tsundere."

"Noooooo!" Al squeals, burying her head in her knees to avoid meeting Juku's gaze. "I'm not! It's not true! He's an unreliable, lecherous, lazy, reckless idiot! I don't like him at all! I don't, I don't, I- I--!"

She sniffles a little bit.

At this point, Kazuma can't help but laugh - totally sober, mind you, but highly entertained by Al's and Juku's antics as they talk. THe sight of Kurou in drag is all but forgotten; Mihiro has gotten dolled up a bit, at least, and looks cuter than ever but is  still ... well, the only girl in here who looks younger is an ageless tome of eldritch lore,  and Al doesn't look THAT much younger than Mihiro herself.

Well, even a cyborg can get drunk, and Leica is pretty handily plastered. That, coupled with the slippery floor of the bath, as well as her unrelenting grip on Solis, ends  up with her loosing her footing and falling to the ground on top of him. On the bright side, her hug of death may have loosened up enough from the fall to let him squirm free. Then again, she's now on top of him and fully exposed to the world in a compromising position.

"Eager, huh? It's okay, I'll take /good/ care of you..." she mumbles, though she sounds rather sleepy.

Meanwhile, above the inn, an enormous black circle inscribed with ancient, unpronounceable runes opens up in the sky. It's difficult to see against the night sky, but the more magically inclined members of the party may be getting a very bad feeling  about this place.

Staren peeks over the edge to see what's happening. Maybe those dress-happy girls have no idea where to look? It looks like... Solis is being accosted by a naked woman! Now, someone with social skills would probably know how to handle that, but Solis... Well, they're friends, right?


 * sploosh*

"Hey! He's taken!"

Somewhere, a yaoi fangirl squees.

"I mean, he has a girlfriend! So... leave him alone!" Staren points dramatically at Leica.

Juku leans back a little and pats Al on the back as she curls up in an attempt to deny everything. "Denying what you feel is unhealthy, ya'know."

Where has Macua been, where has Macua been? That's a very good question. She's been looking for the springs and ahd finally found it, She's in a bikini and seems to have  no issue though she's still got the headband on for whatever on. Worse her pet haro Zako is bounding along with her just as they arrive she stops to stare seeing what's  happening with Solis and the battle nun.

"...S also hey look there's Kazuma. Macua is distracted and she's gong to trip on poor Kazuma he may go down and end up getting smothered himself all the while Zako is  chirping.

"BAD SOLIS!! BAD SOLIS!"

Solis wishes he could become invisible right now... He focuses his mind away from the strangely pleasant thought of the woman on top of him, he looks up at her, "I am not eager, ma'am! Please get off of me, this is causing a  sc..." And then Staren arrives... Then Macua and the damned zako thing... He glances around...to Leica, to Staren, to Macua, "NOT EVERYTHING IS AS IT SEEMS!" He shimmies slightly, putting both hands on Leica's chest to push her off before he pulls himself back to his feet. "Why is everyone insane all of a sudden! I was just trying to escape the roof before the maids came to put Staren in a dress!"

The very /instant/ Staren jumps down to help Solis, the maids are all over him. Really, if he stood any sort of chance at all, it would be /running for his life/ and trying to preserve his masculinity. They've already got everything ready for the makeover, and are totally okay with doing it in the bath. Completely naked. Boy, it's just /one of those nights/, isn't it?

Fortunately for Solis, Leica seems to have passed out and her deathgrip on him has loosened just the tiniest bit. A chance for escape!

Well, now there's no need to make Kazuma crossdress; he's wearing a real live girl!

.... so to speak. More accurately, he's too distracted by the surrounding hilarity to do anything more productive than get a faceful of girlfriend-cleavage when Macua lands on  top of him, the remainder of his current glass of juice spilling on her back as he flails  briefly. "WE'RE UNDER ATTACK! Balmarian seductress at twelve o'--"

"It's just Macua, Kazuma-kun," Shihomi says sweetly, pouring a glass of juice. "Macua-chan, so sweet of you to join us, did you have trouble finding the inn? Here, have some juice; you must be thirsty after coming so far ...."

Meanwhile, just as Staren descends to assist Solis in his travails, Horis shrugs, looks up, frowns a bit at the sky, and sips some more sake, wondering if he ought to let the  captain know something's up or if it's just his imagination.

Al sniffles a bit, and is definitely not sobbing a little at how hopeless she really is. But patting is nice.

Staren is here to help, Solis!

Suddenly, MAIDS!

"ACK! Get offa me!" Staren reaches into his labcoat, "Fools! You think you can defeat the brilliant scientist, Staren Wiremu--?!" In the coat, his hand tightens around the grip of what _looks_ like a plastic toy raygun, when a wet finger slips and hits a  trigger, and there is a distinctive ZAP and Staren is surrounded by a spikey energy field  for a split second...

THE WIREMU SPACE LAB IN SPACE EARLIER THAT WEEK

"Come back Rabi! You know you need your bath!" Staren runs through the lab, chasing a small black blur into a row of shelves. The cabbit leaps up onto a shelf as it flees, knocking devices to the floor as Staren tries to weave around and jump over  them. SLIGHTLY LESS EARLIER

Makaio Wiremu, a middle-aged bespectacled man of greying dark-brown hair, picks up the fallen devices and sets them back at their places, as designated by little plaques  on the shelf. Two almost identical-looking toyish rayguns go to adjacent plaques, labeled STUN RAY and BOY/GIRL RAY.

LATER, A FAR-OFF DIMENSION

A girl who actually looks something like an older, darker-haired Staren with no labcoat adds one more tick mark to a large set of them.

HERE, NOW

When the energy fades, BOY GENIUS STAREN WIREMU looks noticeably shorter and longer-haired and generally softer and curvier and possibly in need of a new title.

She stops, wide-eyed and rather shocked-looking, in the middle of drawing the raygun. "What."

Suddenly, Daijuji Kurou is /very awake/ again. He stands straight up, and says, quite simply, "My continued existance is at risk." He glances left, he glances right, he RUNS OVER and grabs Al Azif, tossing her over a shoulder, before running out into the night,  still in drag, and still very tipsy.

Al, in the meanwhile, is looking more than a little bit pitiful as she's carried out of the inn, blushing redder than a tomato.

The maids stop momentarily. And then they start squeeing.

The squeeing of the maids more than covers the distant squee of closet yaoi fangirls, which then becomes the clack of fingers on keyboards as they get to work on  their Rule 63 fanfiction.

Solis Vivent just looks around the situation... He looks at Staren as he...well... A part of Solis' mind thinks he should try to rescue Staren, another part of his mind sits up and says "No, you idiot. He's another girl now, or looks like one!" Another part of Solis starts in on 'MAIM KILL BURN' Solis for his own part, pulls himself to his full height, raises his hand into the air, and shouts, "EVERYONE! BEHAVE YOURSELVES!"

Staren (conveniently, the name goes both ways. Or maybe it doesn't. What then, Starena?) is just kind of stunned (but not due to the ray, well, not directly) and then OH  GOD THE SQUEEING. She lets go of the gun and lifts her hands to cover her ears from the noise of point-blank squees!

Her gaze catches Solis's. Eyes filled mainly with confusion and OMGWHAT and maybe a dawning bit of DAMMIT MOM AND DAD!

Is she not still your friend? You can have friends that are girls, right?

squish is about what one miht hear as Kazuma got a Macua in a bikini on him and well he's being smothering like solis. She's going to look down and say. "Humm what was that sample, oh wait." She grins as she gets up to stop killing poor Kazuma now. "Prwehaps I should run some experiemtns on you." She's unaware of Staren just yet..

In the background, just barely audible through the squeeing and general sounds of drunken chaos, some kind of low chanting can be heard. The words can't quite be made out, but it sounds very magical and ritualistic. That, and very, /very/ Wrong. Not wrong, in the sense that most people know it, but Wrong, as in utterly not belonging to this  world.

And to add to the effect, an almost unnoticeable fog rolls into the inn and its surrounding area. There's no real /reason/ it's almost unnoticeable. It's purple and smells like dead fish, which should make it /very/ noticeable, but there's something  masking its presence. Like the big circle in the sky, it's just barely on the edge of the conscious senses. Whatever it is, though, everyone's eyelids might be feeling pretty heavy right now...

Solis Vivent grits his teeth as the smoke comes rushing in... He fights it as best he's able...stumbling inside... He draws his sword as he hunts around for his rebreather...

Thoughts rapidly go through Staren's head, as usual.

I can't believe this happened in public is that Macua and I _just announced my name too_ this is so embarassing I'm gonna kill Mom and Dad when I get back home  well not really of course wait what is up with that fog and why does it smell fishy and  why am I tired is this what failing a will save feels like godammit freaking MAGIC

Shaking her head, Staren tries to walk out of the spring and get away... Macua, she's a gundam fighter, she can--

"Help..." She reaches towards Macua, stumbling... must not fall asleep... but it would be sooo easy, and sleep feels sooooooo good right now...

Daijuji Kurou is most fortunately well out of range, and may be enjoying a tender moment with his book somewhere on the beach. Because that's what you do when your friends are being hit by a sleep spell. You walk off in a dress and have private time with your ageless spellbook.

Solis Vivent stumbles through the onsen, hunting for his rebreather... He feels the sleep driving at him, but he keeps pushing it back, holding his breath and moving... Solis has born the weight of the Hostis, complexities that would drive men mad and  crush lesser wills... He stumbles against one of the walls, finding his rebreather...broken, before he grows  and stumbles back outside, "...need to...must not.."

Kazuma dozes off a bit too quickly - it's been a busy day - and he has nothing against the idea of cuddling up with his bikini-clad girlfriend as he commences snoozing. Mihiro, Akane, and Shihomi nod off as well, looking variously adorable to attractive, and even  Blessfield drowses at the table.

That leaves Horis, still on the roof with his sake, wondering why the party got so quiet so quickly, and wrinkling his nose at the fishy smell. Which is really not the only thing that's fishy, so to speak ...

Macua Huitl is feeling tired she does try to fight ti for a while. She see solis at this point. Zako is actually stop panicing and looking for a place to hide. Macua fights it fairly long but eventually she just collapses down and goes to sleep muttering about being so  sleepy. Prehaps she's been worked too hard training or by Katharon. The answer is yes, all it took was a little nudge and she's just sleeping though prehaps the last to pass out.

After several minutes of the chanting and fogging and magic circling, the empty streets of the town of Innsmouth come to life with hordes of horrifying mockeries of the  human form. Though they have the two arms, two legs, one head design scheme, each one of them is some screwed up representation of some form of marine life. It almost looks like Davy Jones's crew leaped out of the TV and started roaming the streets, if  Davy Jones's crew were prone to snatching young human women from their beds at  night to sacrifice to their dark gods.

And so that is what they do here. Or at least, try to do. While they do manage to drag off Staren and the Hadou girls with no issues, Juku reflexively kicks any Deep One that  tries to grab her in a very uncomfortable place, and they eventually just give up on her. Macua's Zako tries to stop them from taking her, but after it knocks one fishman over, another promptly punts it out a window. For now, they do nothing with the men. They don't have time to waste on killing them, not when they have such a tight schedule to  keep.

Or maybe it's just an excuse for a heroic rescue sequence the following day.

Solis Vivent watches as the Snake men take the women away... He fumbles with his weapon...but his feet fail him, causing him to stumble... He glowers at the retreating figures, "...exterminate...annihilate..." He finds his vision fading out, "...destroy..."